Saturday, December 8, 2012

Shivering Soul

I can't stand the cold mornings for long... It can't be denied, it's December. Some people started looking through their Christmas wish lists. They started filling up the shoe boxes to be given away. Me? Well, just like what a friend of mine says, I don't need to wish, I have my God who will supply my needs. Make sense, isn't it? I might be physically shivering because of the cold December winds, emotionally I am shivering too for unknown reason at all. I have this anxiety within me that is so hard to explain. I am not sure if what I felt is normal for other first-time Mom out there. I just cannot control my fears, my worries. Trusting God seems easier said than done (Oops sorry! here goes the pessimistic me again). Honestly, I am still crossing my fingers that God will eventually hear my prayers. He is the God of order and the God of perfect timing. I should live to that.

This morning, I heard from a friend that others already have the things that I've been praying for and she's asking me if I received the same, I said NO. And it left me wondering why. Yes, why oh why? I thought I will always be the head and not the tail. I just cannot understand Lord. Until now I am still in the midst of confusions.I just hope that before this month will end, Your answer to my prayer will be clearer enough. Please enlighten me.

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